


In a Sea of Sound

by TheXJames



Series: It Matters How This Ends [4]
Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Developing Relationship, Established Chloe Beale/Beca Mitchell, Established Relationship, F/F, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Light Angst, POV Chloe, Therapy, light fluff, talking it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-11
Updated: 2018-10-11
Packaged: 2019-07-29 10:50:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16262681
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheXJames/pseuds/TheXJames
Summary: "I didn't want you to choose for us, i wanted you to choose for you." Beca looked up at her and Chloe knew what she meant by that but she was already heated."Oh, like you did? You wanted me to leave you out of the decision so you could feel better about leaving me out of your choice to fuck up our relationship by going to LA?"





	In a Sea of Sound

**Author's Note:**

> So, here's part three of this series. It's neither angsty or fluffy, or super well written because I had a long day at work and my brain is fried. 
> 
> But I wanted to try and keep my posting every day thing going as long as possible. 
> 
> A note before reading, this is going to be the start of the "meat" of this series, so hopefully you'll all like where we're headed here. 
> 
> Also, in case anyone is curious, Beca and Chloe are fairly canon (not PP3 I hate the way they wrote Chloe in that) but there will be things in the future that are NOT canon (such as past relationships, etc). 
> 
> Rated M for language...sorry guys. 
> 
> Also, the song I was listening to while writing this was "Therapy" by All Time Low. Has ZERO to do with the fic, but it's a great song so you're welcome. 
> 
> xx Continue at your own risk...

"Okay, so let's discuss the elephant in the room." Sandra, their therapist said. "Boston."   
  
Chloe was fed up. "I don't understand why this keeps coming up? You told me it was my choice, I chose to come here. What's the problem?" She looked at Beca, who had her eyes closed and was breathing deeply.   
  
"Chlo..." Beca paused and Chloe waited. She could see that the other girl was trying to get her thoughts in order. Probably to keep things from spiralling the way they had the first time this conversation happened.   
  
Five weeks ago   
  
__ "I accepted the internship in San Fransisco." Chloe stated over lunch. She and Beca had gone to the coffee shop down the street and decided to eat there and enjoy being out of the studio for a while.   
  
"You did?" Beca asked calmly.    
  
"Yeah. I think it's the best for both of us."    
  
Beca stared at Chloe for a minute without responding. Finally she looked down and mumbled "for both of us..." She looked back at Chloe. "Is that what you want?"    
  
Chloe was confused. She'd just told Beca what she'd decided. "Of course it is."   
  
"Why?" Beca asked.   
  
"What do you mean? I just told you, it's best for us both. I will have a good internship at the exotic animal hospital and there are a lot of labels you can get on at."   
  
"Okay." Beca stated simply and continued eating her lunch. Chloe had expected Beca to be at least a little excited about going to San Fransisco. She did not anticipate this reaction. Beca seemed almost upset as she quietly ate.    
  
"Is that not okay with you?" Chloe asked.   
  
"Is what not?"    
  
"San Fransisco. I thought you'd be happy."    
  
Beca stood up to throw her trash away. She turned back towards Chloe. "I'm happy wherever you want to go. For you. For your career. Not for what you think is best for us."    
  
As Beca left the coffee shop Chloe hurried to follow. They didnt say a word as the two walked back to their apartment. As soon as Beca closed the door however, Chloe turned to her.   
  
"Why are you upset that I made a decision with you in mind?"   
  
"Because it's not about me Chloe!" Beca shouted.    
  
Now Chloe had learned some things about her girlfriend over the years. She hates snails (she's secretly creeped out by them), she has never cried over a movie but will cry over songs, and she very rarely raises her voice at Chloe. Sure, Beca will get excited or embarrassed and her voice goes up in octave, but Beca hardly ever yells. Chloe thinks it stems from watching her parents get into screaming matches and not wanting to be that way.    
  
Beca was very close to yelling at Chloe right about now. That was the first indicator that she was not just upset, but angry, at Chloe's decision. Chloe knew she should drop it, she should cool off and broach the subject later, but she didn't understand what had set Beca off.    
  
"What gives you the right to be pissed at me? All I did was choose to take a job opportunity that benefits you as well!"    
  
Beca paced between the living room and kitchen area, mumbling under her breath. Chloe knew she was trying to find the right words so she paused, wanting to hear Beca's reason for being so shitty.   
  
"I didn't want you to choose for us, i wanted you to choose for you." Beca looked up at her and Chloe knew what she meant by that but she was already heated.   
  
"Oh, like you did? You wanted me to leave you out of the decision so you could feel better about leaving me out of your choice to fuck up our relationship by going to LA?"   
  
She regretted the words immediately. Beca's shoulders dropped and she looked down at her shoes.    
  
"That's not what I meant..."    
  
Chloe felt nauseous. She didn't want to fight; she'd intended on celebrating tonight. They needed to stop this conversation before it got worse.    
  
"It doesn't matter." Chloe said softly. "I've already emailed both positions and told them my decision. There's no reason to argue about this." She watched as Beca sat at the kitchen table before she continued. "Let's just enjoy our day together. It's not often we're both home." Beca smiled at her as she nodded her agreement but Chloe could tell it didn't reach her eyes.   
  
  
Anytime Boston had come up since then Beca would try to talk about it and Chloe would shut her down. It hurt her that Beca didn't appreciate being considered in her decision, and she didn't want to hear all the reasons she should go to Boston instead.    
  
By the time they got to San Fransisco it didn't seem to be an issue anymore. Chloe loved her internship and Beca had been able to move her show to anther radio station while she put in resumes at some local labels.    
  
"Chloe," Beca repeated, bringing Chloe back to the conversation at hand. "I love how thoughtful you are. I love that you chose moving here because you thought it would make me happy." Beca reached over and took her hand as she continued. "But you can't make decisions like this for me. I know you love your job but what if you hadn't? It would have been my fault that you picked to not go to one of the best internships in the country. Hell, it's my fault even with you loving it here." Beca stopped and glanced at the therapist who nodded for her to continue.    
  
"One of my biggest fears is that you will resent me. That you will feel like you have to give up parts of your career, of yourself, for me." Chloe saw the tears starting to form in Beca's eyes. "I never want you to miss out on anything for me. I can work from anywhere, I can make music from anywhere. As long as I'm with you then in good. You shouldn't make decisions regarding your career based on what you think I will prefer."    
  
Chloe had no idea Beca felt this way, probably because she hadn't given her the chance to say anything about it. She allowed herself a moment to absorb everything Beca had told her before responding.    
  
"Baby I love you. I wanted to come here because it was good for both of us." She was interrupted by Sandra clearing her throat.    
  
"Chloe, can you answer a question for me?" She felt Beca tense up beside her, probably guessing what the question was.    
  
"Sure." Chloe responded.   
  
"If you weren't with Beca would you have gone to Boston?"    
  
Chloe went to say no, but she caught herself. Would she have gone to Boston? Honestly she wasn't sure.    
  
"I don't know." She decided to go with the truth.   
  
"Okay, and that's okay." Sandra stated. "Do you think Beca was your determining factor for choosing San Fransisco?"    
  
"Yes." Again, honesty.    
  
"So you can see her concern?" Chloe glanced at Beca and shook her head yes. Beca chose that time to speak again.   
  
"It upset me so bad when you told me because I knew you were doing it for me. And that's the person you are Chloe, you think about other people before yourself and I love you for it. But you have to put yourself first. You have to trust that when I say something I mean it, and I did mean it when I told you it didn't matter where we went. Whatever makes you happy is what I want." Beca smiled at her softly.    
  
"Now Beca the same applies for you." Sandra said. "The two of you have a strong relationship, but you can't lose yourselves within that relationship. You have to communicate with each other about what you both want, then you can make decisions as partners."    
  
Chloe nodded but kept looking at Beca. She couldn't get Sandra's earlier question out of her head. Would she have gone to Boston had Beca not been in the picture? Did it even matter now?   
  
"We're out of time for this week but I'll see you both next Tuesday. And do your homework. Beca, I'll see you at our regular time?" Sandra asked. Beca nodded yes as she and Chloe stood to leave.    
  
Chloe still hadn't said anything as they got in the elevator. Beca pressed the button for the lobby and turned to her.    
  
"You okay?" She questioned.   
  
"Would I have gone to Boston?" Chloe gave no context but Beca didn't need any.    
  
"I don't know Chlo, and I wasn't trying to make you second guess anything. I know you love it here, and I do too."    
  
"I dont actually feel that way about LA you know." Again, Chloe provided no context as she brought up their conversation from weeks ago.    
  
Beca looked at her for a moment before realization dawned on her.    
  
"I do." She said quietly. "I was selfish and stupid. And I thought we were invincible. And because of that I broke us. Broke you."    
  
Chloe took Beca's hand, causing Beca to look at her again.    
  
"You were selfish, a little bit." She smiled, causing Beca to laugh lightly. "But you've never been stupid. And you didn't break me. You put me back together." She kissed the other girl softly as the doors to the elevators opened.    
  
Once in the car Chloe looked at their homework for this week. It was their third week with Sandra and already Chloe felt like they were communicating better. She'd been a little surprised when Beca decided to start going by herself once a week as well, but it seemed to be helping her talk to Chloe about things more.    
  
Chloe knew Beca had things from her past she'd never really dealt with. She also knew they had things in their relationship that had never been dealt with. She was excited though, to deal with those things together.    
  
  
  
As they drove through the hills toward their apartment complex, Chloe looked at the sun setting on the city. She felt it's warmth on her skin and in her heart. They passed a trolley full of people looking around excitedly, the cute little donut shop Chloe had discovered on her way to work the first week there, and a gorgeous view of the golden gate bridge as they turned on their street. Chloe smiled as she thought to herself,    
  
"I wouldn't have gone to Boston."   
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Whoomp, there it is! 
> 
> This series is going to be focusing on couples counseling (HOORAY!) 
> 
> I was fairly sure this was the direction I was headed at the beginning, but for any of you who are not into the whole counseling thing I totally get that. Not offended at all if you stop reading.
> 
> This is a story close to my heart, as I've witnessed (personally and indirectly) the benefits of seeking help, either personally or in your relationship. I haven't seen many (any?) fics that focus on this and I think it could be an interesting way to go.
> 
> Don't worry though, if that's not your jam I'll keep updating my other series as well (What Happens When Time Stands Still?) and will more than likely through a few more one shots on here from time to time. 
> 
> Okay now give me feedback, it nourishes me. (I'm talking to you, kid.)


End file.
